How to Improve a Sentence

Why This Matters

Many students write sentences that are technically correct, but weak.

So they try to “improve” them — and end up making things worse.
The key is to improve for clarity, not complexity.

You’re not here to sound impressive.
You’re here to be precise.

Improving your sentences means adding development, detail, or logical flow — not stuffing in long words or memorised phrases.

This page will show you how to fix dull or underdeveloped sentences without falling into the trap of peacock words, padding, or over-complication.

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Example 1 – Add a Clear Explanation

Weak:
Children enjoy playing video games.

Why it’s weak:
It’s too general. There’s no clear link to the topic or argument.

Improved:
Many children enjoy playing video games, but excessive use can reduce their attention span and interfere with academic performance.

Why it works:
The sentence now adds a relevant cause-effect idea.
It’s no longer just a description — it’s part of a logical argument.

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Example 2 – Be Specific, Not Vague

Weak:
Some people think tourism is good.

Why it’s weak:
“Good” doesn’t tell us anything. It’s vague, lazy, and meaningless in an academic essay.

Improved:
Some people argue that tourism supports the local economy by creating jobs and increasing demand for services.

Why it works:
Now we’ve got a clear, specific benefit.
The examiner can immediately see your point and how it connects to the question.

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Example 3 – Expand a Basic Idea

Weak:
Libraries are important for students.

Improved:
Libraries provide essential academic resources and a quiet environment for study, helping students prepare for exams more effectively.

Why it works:
We’ve moved from a general claim to a detailed explanation and specific benefit.
This is exactly the kind of developed idea examiners are looking for.

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What to Avoid

Padding:
Don’t add empty phrases like “this is very significant” unless you actually explain why.
More words without more meaning will lower your score.

Peacock Words:
Avoid dressing up simple ideas with complicated vocabulary.
If you wouldn’t naturally say a word (like “ameliorate” or “plethora”) in conversation, don’t use it in IELTS writing.

Overcorrection:
Adding extra clauses or complicated grammar doesn’t automatically improve your writing.
Every sentence must do a job — if it doesn’t help build your argument, cut it.

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Final Advice

Improving a sentence isn’t about making it longer or fancier.
It’s about making it work harder.

When you review a sentence, always ask:

• Is it clear?

• Is it specific?

• Does it develop my point?

If the answer is yes, leave it.
If the answer is no, add just enough explanation or detail to make it clear — then stop.

Be specific. Be relevant. Say what you mean — then move on.

That’s how you impress the examiner.